If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
This is my life. Enjoy the view
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
