I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Randomize
