he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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