And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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