He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
