You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
