Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Terrible idea I love it
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
