Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize