You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
