did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
