honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
