you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Randomize
