I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
