People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
