I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
