tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
