Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
