I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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