She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
