I want to stick my p in your. b.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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