I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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