I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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