We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
