literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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