he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Randomize
