his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
