Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
