Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize