Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
