And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
