I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
