ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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