dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
