I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
and you fell through a lawn chair
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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