i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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