is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
