That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
