So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
