East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
This baby is an asshole
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
