I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
