So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
