The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
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