NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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