are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Randomize
