Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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