With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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