I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
