The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
