singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
