I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
